Thứ Bảy, 11 tháng 2, 2012

Pet Society reels in Fizzyfish the Soda Pop Fish

A new fish just entered the Pet Society pond. The Fizzyfish is the freshest fish around, fo shizzle ma nizzles. I like how the cap looks like a pair of juicy red lips. How to catch this Fizzyfish? Try the bottle of Coca-Cola sold in the vending machines. You can either buy one of these yourself for 900 coins, or if you see it at a friend's house, just pay 50 coins for a drink.

While I think the Fizzyfish is cool, I feel mixed about this vending machine. Earlier this year, big soda companies like PepsiCo have vowed to remove full-calorie sodas from machines in schools by 2012. However, diet sodas will continue to be sold to students.

I used to be a Diet Coke addict for years. I'd drink one every day during lunch. If I didn't have one, I'd feel like my whole afternoon was shot.

Drinking a Diet Coke for me was almost a sensual experience. I loved wrapping my hand around an ice-cold can. I loved opening the can and hearing it pop. I loved that first sip, feeling the fizz on my tongue and tasting the dark brown Splenda-laced liquid. If the soda was served in a glass at a restaurant, I liked the look of it: dark, bubbly, with a tower of glistening ice cubes. Pet Society Anonymous Goodbye Diet CokeI ignored the dentists' warnings that carbonated drinks disintegrate your teeth. I ignored the doctors who said that soda leads to osteoporosis. (Osteoporosis is the bone disease that causes older people to shrink and stoop.)

I reasoned that Diet Coke wasn't so bad, because it had zero calories. I reasoned that because it makes you feel full, it keeps you from overeating and becoming obese, ignoring the studies that showed that diet sodas may actually stimulate appetite.

Then, one night, I overdosed on Diet Coke. I was at work late, and downed three cans in an hour. I also ate three Hershey bars, which, by the last couple of bites, looked and tasted like they were made out of cat poo.

After that ugly night, I woke up and vowed to cleanse my body. This is the only body I'm gonna have. Treat it like a temple. I decided to stop drinking Diet Coke once and for all.

It was a pretty tough battle for the first few days. During lunch, I missed that can of Diet Coke, and I missed all those cold and bubbly sensations. But after I got over the hump, it got easier and easier to say no to Diet Coke.

I haven't had Diet Coke, or any other soda, in nine months. I've been drinking a lot of water instead. Good old H2O. It's plentiful, it's free, and it's really good for you.

In April or May, I was at a local corner shop, and for old times' sake, I bought a can of Diet Coke. It was a warm, sunny day and I relished that feeling of the cold can in my hands again. But after I opened it, I couldn't drink more than a few sips. Why? It tasted awful, like soap water. Perhaps there was something wrong with that can. I had a friend take a sip. He shrugged and said that's how it usually tastes. I was stumped. I couldn't believe I had been addicted to that bizarre soap water for years.

It's funny how addictions are. When you're addicted to something, you think you can't live without it. You think that it's good for you, even when the object of your addiction treats you badly. It's like having a crush on a guy who doesn't love you back. Your line of reasoning becomes less and less logical and more and more desperate. Then after a while, after you've managed to come to your senses and step away from the addiction, you wonder what it was about it that you really liked.

This article originally appeared on Pet Society Anonymous.

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